Queer Eye for the Draenei

he Draenei are getting a lot of popularity recently. That's because they have been confirmed as the new Alliance race. Better yet, they were given a whole knew look (think Archimonde) and they were given classes that do not suit their look at all. The basic Warrior, something every class has, the Hunter, a class the Alliance only had 2 of to the Horde's 3, the Priest, something the alliance really wasn't lacking but balances out the potential for Blood Elf Priests which are very likely, the Mage which also balances out the number of races that can use this class Horde and Alliance side, and the really odd choice of Paladin, which balances out the 3 Horde specific to 2 Alliance specific class/race combos. With the way the Draenei look it is almost impossible to see them as anything but warlocks, but this race is supposedly a race that is attuned to the light, or something like that. I don't care personally, it's an awesome race.

First off let's go with the classes that don't seem so Draenei, or at least by their appearance. The first would be the Hunter. Why are the Draenei able to be Hunters? Well, I dunno the whole "lore" behind it, but it is a balancing class. How many times have you seen on the forums "X Faction has less of Y class than Z faction!!!"? Well, Blizzard is finally tired of all that whining you do, so with the new races they are balancing the factions both player-wise and class-wise. Hunters are a balancing class, bringing 1 more Hunter race to the Alliance for you whiney little babies. On the other hand, Priest seems completely off the wall, since not only does the Horde have 1 less Priest class to start, but the Alliance has arguably one of the best priest racials in the game: Fear Ward. Why more Priests on the Alliance? Well, you can't have a race that can be a Paladin and not a Priest, right? As for Paladins, once again it's racial balance. I know I will be starting a Draenei Paladin, how about you? "Ugh! That's f***ing cheap! The Paladin stunned me then ate my soul!"

As for racial abilities, well, speculation abounds for both new races yet. Talk of what they will have has already been said, and since E3 is still raging at the time I'm writing this, we may know before you ever read this. Cuz you are lazy and slow. Racials should be easy to figure out though, with Blood Elves likely getting Int boosts and Magic resists, while Draenei are likely to get a bonus to Gnome Punting and the ability to kill a target player permanently. Seriously, I have no clue what the Draenei will get. That's like trying to figure out if Jerry Springer will have concubine midgets or gay dogs on his show tonight. You just don't know. I really do hope to see the Draenei getting something along the lines of their abilities in WC3 TFT, say a short lived Windwalk, the ability to call upon spirits to help them, or maybe even the ability to heal themselves regardless of class. "Don't worry about the tank, he's his own best healer."

One thing that still astounds me is how the Draenei have gone from puny lanky pieces of nasty brown skin covered in bandages to tall dark and menacing creatures of dread. Better yet, their eyes have mysteriously started glowing blue instead of the normal yellow. Now, I don't know how colored contacts fit into the WoW storyline, but those fashion designers down at Blizzard should have no trouble finding a reason. Clearance sale or something. Unlike ANY of the Alliance races, hell, even HORDE races, Draenei look demonic without being covered in Dreadmist. They look almost like Archimonde, the guy who tried to steal the power of the World Tree, aka the guy that owed me $50 that I'll never see again. They are not the Alliance's ugly race either. They are far from ugly. They have unappealing features, things that on any other race would look horrible, but the combination of features works well for this race. Hooves, face tentacles, glowing eyes, the build of a steroid junky. Who says that isn't great looking? Just don't respond truthfully when they ask if this armor makes them look fat. "Your soul is mine!"

I personally love the Draenei and the classes they can play. I know I won't be the only one playing a Draenei Paladin, and whoever the other one person that decides to play one is, well, gotta love ya, because we will be alone in a world full of Draenei Warriors and Mages. I hated the changes, but after I read more and saw the classes, I thought 'hell yes'. I hope you enjoy them too, especially when I stun you and eat your soul.